Monday, September 26, 2011

Mothers then and now

I have been a mother for over 4 years now and boy have I learnt a lot. Mostly, I have learnt that I don't have a clue about a lot of things. It is interesting how my perspective has changed and I imagine it will continue to change.

I used to think a good mother was a mother;

whose baby slept through the night

who had her children potty trained at a young age

who was put together

whose children were always tidy and clean

who was multi-talented

who was an exceptional cook

whose home looked beautiful and full of homemade novelties

whose children were perfectly behaved

who never got angry

All those points previously mentioned are awesome, but I don't think those awesome things make a mother great.

Right now I think a great mother is someone;

who scarifies stuff to put her family first

who puts her relationship with her spouse top of the list

who listens

who cares about her kids and their interests

who is patient

who acknowledges her faults and willingly apologizes

who puts away pride and replaces it with humility

who takes time

who prays

who studies and cares about being a better mother

who tries not to compare

who teaches her children correct principles such as honesty, kindness, courage, through example and consistency.

Well, that's the type of mother I hope to be it is the longest process EVER and sometimes I an so exhausted and want to hibernate but I do believe the challenge motherhood presents will refine me in ways that no other calling can.

Sunday, September 25, 2011


Ben's family rafts. We have been talking about taking my family rafting but never got into the specifics until NOW.

I convinced my mother that rafting was fun and not scary. I described what the rafting trip would be like, leaving a few things out because my sweet mother is an over thinker and will talk herself out of anything thing that might be dangerous.

After being on the river for maybe 5 minutes we come head to head with the first rapids, these rapids are not scary at all for most people but for my mother I am pretty sure she may have wet her pants at the site of them. Our boat was in front and I turned around and smiled and yelled "good luck!"

Once her heart stopped palpitating I think she loved it.

Beth wanted more rapids and said she could do it all day, plus she caught her first fish.

Dad was just glad his new teeth were still in place.

Maize the Dog Loved it! She jumped in at any opportunity when Beth wasn't sitting on her.

Ben was awesome in our make shift boat (we had left an essential element of the oaring frame at Grandpa's and had to improvise). He also jumped off the cliff, he is a STUD!

Mike was a great tease to my mom, but made her feel least I think.

Liz was ever agreeable and happy.

I was entertained and soaked up the river and the mountains. I randomly jumped into the river, it was SO cold and Jack freaked out because I couldn't climb back in. I would have loved to have seen me try to get back into the boat.

Jack was terrified and cried the entire time we were in the raft except for the last 10 minutes. We rafted for a couple of hours.

Mum, want to do the Snake river next year?

Sunday together: We sang and I loved EVRY second.


Saturday, September 24, 2011

Doggy date

My family came to visit...wait THREE weeks ago? Wow, time did fly. They came to my beautiful home which was in full construction zone. AWESOME host I am! Anyway one of the days we headed the long way (thanks to mum's GPS) to Chatfield State Park here in Denver so our dogs could have a date. They have a large off leash area for the dogs. Reagan, our energetic and rather loopy dog was in doggy heaven.

I put her dog SHOCK collar on (don't worry I don't abuse it, promise) so she ran all over the place sniffing and bouncing through the long grass. This caused Jack to FREAK out. He was in a perpetual state of fear that we would loose our dog. Jack would call for Reagan in a high pitched happy voice she would bound by and then he would start crying and screaming as ran into another field.

Finally, I was able to help Jack relax by letting him play in the pond. Lucas was thrilled the idea of getting wet and muddy so finally we had TWO happy boys and TWO happy dogs.

the pond

the dirty child

I think my mother was horrified by how dirty I let my baby get, really I don't think he got very dirty at all.

Friday, September 23, 2011

It has been a while...

Over here in the Carney household we have had a few changes. The kitchen was the project and it has been my arch enemy for way too long. We had all our walls stripped and re-textured and then primed and painted. Now to all you savvy house project lovers this most likely sounds like nothing but a little project but to me it was exhausting and frustrating. It is still not finished but all the messy time consuming work is done.

I used to say I love painting. I DO NOT love PAINTING! Quite the opposite in fact.

I found a glorious rug and it makes my kitchen delightful one of these days I might share a photo when my kitchen is clean and tidy.

This photo makes my heart smile:)

Friday, September 9, 2011

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Summer days are drawing to a close

I am not too sure how many more hot days we have left. We are taking advantage of them before Fall comes and blows them all away.

The boys wanted close ups; this is what we got:


Wednesday, September 7, 2011

My parenting books

I have been immersed in parenting reading material as of late and it has made a profound impact upon me. I was getting to a point where I found myself constantly moaning and focusing on all the hard things about being a mother; how it doesn't come naturally to me and how it is exhausting etc...

I decided I needed to treat motherhood and parenting as if that was my job, which it is! If you are doing a job you are not terribly great at you research it and learn all you can to improve. So I have been reading parenting stuff whenever I get a spare couple minutes here and there. The snippets of information, direction and encouragement I get here and there from my reading really helps me maintain a good perspective throughout the day.

The books I am reading right now are:

Teaching your children Values, Linda and Richard Eyer

The 7 habits of highly effective Families, Stephen R Covey

The Entitlement trap, Linda and Richard Eyer

"The greatest thing you can do for your children is love your spouse" Covey

"There is a tremendous need for husbands and wives to sit down together and carefully plan or, in a sense, mentally or spiritually create their own future" Covey

"We should teach values to our children because it is the most significant and effective thing we can do for their happiness" Eyer

Talking about Parents here is a snap shot of my lovely parents that I took while they were visiting, more on that later.


Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Typical Morning

Now we are back into the school year D man graces our pressence two times a week. Lately, Jack Attack and D man have been doing a lot of bike ridding.
Our last few mornings together (Jack, D man, lucas, reagan and I) have looked a lot like this;

and then when we are tired or bored or have too many scapes we head on in and do letters.


Monday, September 5, 2011

My pride is punctured.

This a conversation from earlier today about a photo shoot I did recently:

Me: So did those photos work out for you? (in a high pitched excited "I can't wait to hear your opinion of them" voice)
Client: Urm, yeah (No excitment whatsoever)
me: Which one did you use?
Client: I didn't use any of them

Awkward moment as my pride gets a serious puncture and begins rapid deflation

My photos were not loved maybe not even liked. People have always said they have like my photos in the past granted they might have been lying but this was a first to experience the raw rejection.

Initially I was devastated. First because my pride was punctured but also because these people are really cool and I wanted them to love the photos or at least one of them.

I wanted to give up on photography and wallow in self pity.

BUT... I am better than that right? AND I really LOVE taking photos. I am going to learn from this. Personally, I LOVED the photos from this specific session and was really pleased with them, they really represented my style as of now and my style is not for everyone and I think I am OK with that but it hurts a little, maybe a lot:( I will re-look at the photos and critique them and see how I could have done a better job.

They say failure is the best medicine for success, so here is many more failures!

Sunday, September 4, 2011

Are burdens holding you back?

I had the opportunity to teach the ladies at church last Sunday, as if I have anything to offer them. I am privileged to associate with wonderful woman who are great examples to me. My lesson was taken from a talk given by Boyd K Packer a General Authority of the Church Of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints and can be found in full here. I choose to focus on the latter part of the talk.

My favorite part was this quote;

"If you are carrying some burden, forget it, let it alone. Do a lot of forgiving and a little repenting, and you will be visited by the Spirit of the Holy Ghost and confirmed by the testimony that you did not know existed."

Sometimes we allow the challenges of life to burden our lives so much that they prevent us from progressing forward. If this is the case the best option that leads to happiness is to "forget it and let it alone." I believe that the Holy Ghost is a member of the God head and can be our companion if we are worthy but only can we hear it promptings if we are focused of progressing towards God. If there is something in your way that is not helping you progress forward "forget it and let it alone." This is not easy but it is worth it.

I shared with the beautiful ladies at church an experience I had. I felt hurt and decided to take offence. Thoughts such as "I am sick of being nice because people just take advantage of me" and "I am just not going to offer any more" and "they should have known better" surged through my mind. And all of a sudden I started thinking of other things and people who have wronged me. Before you knew I was of the track of anger. As I was fuming to Ben he stopped me. "Who are you? You need to stop!" I realized that I had allowed a small misfortune to burden me so much that I didn't even represent myself, I had allowed darkness into my being.

At that moment I decided to to suck up my pride and "forget it and let it alone!" and let light and happiness back into my world.

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Jack's first Pinewood Derby

Ben's new work Rally Software had a family pinewood derby event last weekend. Jack was thrilled. Even though making the derby car was somewhat last minute he thought it was wonderful. I had to finish the car for him while he was at pre-school and was worried at his response.

Coming out of pre-school he could barley wait. "Mom can I see my car? please, please?" After getting buckled in I handed him the car and eagerly waited his response.


"mom... This is .... GREAT!" this was followed by lots of "this is the best car ever" and "I love my car so much!"

The car was somewhat primitive compared to others but it was Jack's car and he loved it. In the practice runs his car was not so great but it managed to win it race. Who would have thought?!

After racing we played ping pong. Ben's work is so cool, at least Jack thinks so...

Lucas Kept trying to escape but he had his name tag on so I always found him

I wanted a family picture so I made everyone place their head on the ping pong table, pressed the timer and smile. As this happens the founder of the company walks by and see this;

poor Ben.

Friday, September 2, 2011

T-BALL is over:(

We signed Jack up for T-Ball this summer. For my English friends T-Ball is like baseball but the ball is not thrown it is placed on a T and the child hits it from that. Jack really enjoyed it. Mostly he cared about hitting the ball and when he wasn't hitting the ball was starring into oblivion.

When his coach would say "Hussle" which I gather means move fast he did the opposite. There were several instance when he got into a little rough and tumble over getting the ball which was somewhat entertaining to watch. Most of all he thought his coach was awesome. As soon as his coach, Aaron arrived at practice Jack would be the first to go up and say hello and tell him something totally insignificant but felt wonderful doing it.


Thursday, September 1, 2011

How to be relaxed under pressure?

Answers please?

I would love to be that wife and mother who can just roll with the punches and seem so chill and laid back about spontaneous events.

BUT I am not.

The other weekend Ben had invited several guys over to help build a fence in yard. THANK YOU SO MUCH!!The guys brought their families. By the end of the evening we had about 20 people at our home. A part of me LOVED it but the other half was a little stressed. I think the fact that it was spontaneous threw me off. Darn that schedule aspect of my character.

At one point my friends hubby asked me, "Hope your OK with all of us here or is it stressful?" his wife answered for me "she's stressed!" She can read me well;) I was stressed but I so desperately wanted to be OK with all the energy and chaos.

Practice makes perfect right? More get togethers at my place then!

Here are some photos of our delicious tomoatos grow by Ben and Jack. They are SO good.

There on the side is my Lucas being his dirty self and YES his diaper is falling off. I am such a good mom huh?

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